August 11, 2014

The Big Move

I NEVER saw myself living anywhere but, good little old Idaho. I am a small town girl through and through. I love the laid back lifestyle. I love the weather summer and winter. I love knowing lots of people in the small towns. I love KNOWING my neighbors personally. I love leaving by family. I could go on and on about all the things I love about living in Idaho. But you get the point. When Aaron said he was offered a job in Henderson, Nevada I was SUPER excited at that thought. He was offered the job several months before the actual move. So it didn't seem REAL. It just felt exciting. Don't get me wrong. The thought of him having a job was the most appealing part. Having a pay check to count on was a huge blessing. As the time grew closer and closer I started having anxiety, days and days of tears, lots more sleepless nights. I was SCARED. As I sit here and write this post I have SO many emotions running through me and tears streaming down my face. I am still really vulnerable and emotional, because I really miss HOME. 
Las Vegas is SO different than Idaho. I came down a few weeks before we planned to move to find a place to live. Cami dropped me off at the airport and after I got through the hustle of check in and security and finally sat down the tears started flowing. Sidenote: I am the ugliest cryer of life and my tears are huge and once I start I can not stop. The people around me probably thought I was crazy. I was thinking I couldn't picture my family living here. I was scared for them and for me. I sent a text to one of my good friends that lives in the las vegas area and said "Give me some encouragement" She was the best person to get it from since she had also never lived anywhere but Idaho and then she moved to Las Vegas. I cried the whole way home. 
Moving day came so quickly. I feel super blessed to have lived in such an awesome neighborhood. If I can give you one piece of advice it would be this NEVER TAKE FOR GRANTED WHAT YOU HAVE, BECAUSE ONE DAY YOU MAY NOT. If you would have asked me several months ago if I loved my neighborhood I would have probably told yes for my kids sake but for me no. Only because of my own insecurities. I moved into this neighborhood when I was just 19 years old and a young mom. I was still a KID myself so I defiantly had those times were I was very insecure. So pretty much the people that I lived by and went to church with saw and helped me grow into the women I am today. The good the bad and the ugly. Literally.  My kids had great friends and they loved to play outside and I never worried about them when they were. I trusted them in my neighbors homes. They could play from sun up to sun down and never get tired of it. The big kids played with the little kids and the moms looked out for everyones kids. I loved that. My advice is real. I never have felt so loved and cared for than I did the days leading up to leaving. I had tons of texts, people stopping over, cards left on my porch, and tons of tear filled hugs. We had lots of help with loading our moving truck. My Mom had come down and spent the whole day with me and I will never take that time for granted. I am and adult and I will happily admit that I am a Momma's girl. I need her and love her. Saying "good bye" to her was one of the hardest things ever. I still cry thinking about her. On the morning we were leaving I had several friends stop by to hug us and cry with us, giving us cards and gifts if you reading this I can could never express the  gratitude I have for each and everyone of you. Pulling away that afternoon was the 2nd hardest thing. I cried all the way to Provo so for a good 4 hours my eyes were burning and couldn't see. I had to force myself to stop. 
We got to St. George late that night with hoping to get a good nights rest, but the hotel Aaron booked through Price line was disgusting so bad that we couldn't sleep there so we decided to just drive the rest of the way to Las Vegas. We didn't have help coming until Saturday to help us move our things in to the house. So we had a few days of hanging out On Saturday morning the members of our new ward showed up at 7 AM... 7 AM on a Saturday to help us. I came downstairs and was SHOCKED to see how many people were here. It only took 30 minutes to get everything unloaded. Amazing. 
We have been here just over a week and today I am feeling like this vacation can end anytime now. I am ready to go home. I am hoping that these feeling go away soon. 
I have had to rely on Faith and prayer the past month. Never in my life have I prayed so hard, but this has been the only time in my life that I have truly felt my prayers being heard. I have had to have lot of strength and courage for my sake and for my families. I could sit everyday and probably cry my head off, but I want to be a better example for my kids. I don't know how I made it from St.George to Las Vegas that night. I was so tired, but we made it safely. I prayed that the house we picked would be a good fit for our family, and just with the love and support we have received from our ward I know that my prayer was answered. I have so much gratitude in my heart. Ainzley's kindergarten teacher gave me some great advice before I moved. She encouraged me to put myself out there and really make an effort to meet new people, and I have really taken that advice to heart. If you know me at all this is REALLY hard for me. I am defiantly an introvert. More than half of the people here are not friendly people. My first experience at the post office was a nightmare, but I have really tried to just smile at everyone and say hello to strangers. I have really felt a difference in my heart. After being in such a dark place for so long leading up to this move, maybe Heavenly Father was preparing me for this in away. In that I really have to put in the effort to feel that joy in my heart that I haven't felt for so long, and he is giving me the strength to do what I need to feel that. 
I just want to say thank you to all those that have texted me this past week checking in on us. I have needed everyone of those. If you are still reading this thank you don't judge me for all the mistakes I am not going to go back and proof read it. These are my raw emotion speaking and my heart can only handle it once:).

We love these people and even though I was a hot mess that day I want them to know how grateful I am for them and how much we love them. And Jill if you are reading this... (i know you are) I am so lucky to have you has a friend. Thank you so so much for all your help and your continued help. I love you and am so grateful for you and our friendship. Lets get that girls weekend planned already. :)

Please excuse the poor quality of these pictures they are phone pictures and I uploaded them from my phone.

1 comment:

  1. I think there is something so unique to learn when you've been forced out of your comfort zone. You will forge amazing friendships and learn so much about yourself. I wish you the best in your new adventures! Love your blog, keep up the good work.


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